March 29, 2011

A little History – IV

Another wonderful product is Instant Messaging.  When I first started exploring IM, I conversed with a number of interesting people.  I would find them in particular Yahoo interest groups – primarily bondage related.  As I mentioned before, IM oddly allows you to assess the other party much better than you think it would.  And so it was that I found a very interesting woman.  She was actually a sub to a master.  She had a great deal of real life experience in a D/s relationship.  Let’s call her “B”. 

B’s master was very skilled and they both were very involved with the D/s community.  She experienced many different types of control from what she wore under clothing to how she would be restrained at home to how and when she had permission to do everyday functions.  B knew I was a sub, and after a significant amount o chatting between us her master gave her permission to control me via IM.  B also knew I liked feminine apparel. 

By now I had accumulated a bunch more toys.  Handcuffs, fixed hinged handcuffs, wrist cuffs, ankle cuffs, several types of hoods, collars, nipple clamps, a crop, a leather armbinder, a spandex mummybag and much more.  I enjoyed experimenting as much as I could with these items, although in an online fashion.  While we were not in contact every day, we did converse quite frequently.  I was required to wear panties every day and occasionally to wear pantyhose to the office under my business suit.  At night I may have to place myself in some form of self-bondage, fill myself with some enema concoction or subject myself to some type of discipline (crop, nipple clamps etc.).

I do have one funny story.  One day in the office I was wearing pantyhose under my suit.  Mid-day I was waiting outside my boss’ office (offices all had glass walls).  For some reason my clothing felt a bit odd.  I reached behind me (backside facing a colleague’s office) and felt a large tear in my suit pants.  It was a large tear.  Because I was wearing the pantyhose, I had not noticed the air flow that normally would have been obvious.  The hole was so big I held the reports in my hand behind me covering the hole best I could and hurried back to my office.  Fortunately, I had a light trench coat in my office.  I put it on and quickly headed out of the office onto public transportation to get to a department store to buy some new pants.  I returned to the office to change into them.  I worried that I had been exposed for a long time and no one said anything.  I assume no one noticed.  I would have been so humiliated.

The next segment will describe a proposal to meet and serve.  Stay tuned.

March 19, 2011

A Little History – III

Living on the west coast made access easy to all things bondage and crossdress related it seemed.  I started to collect more bondage equipment.  I became aware of the wonderful characteristics of latex and would buy a few sissy items.  Panties, foundation garments, pantyhose and heels.  I still had no Mistress, but that did not stop me from accumulating items that turned me on.  From Versatile Fashions I acquired a pretty satin maid’s dress with a multilayer petticoat.  From Seattle I bought a full coverage heavy latex catsuit.  And finally, I acquired a stainless steel Access Denied chastity belt with front and back covers.  This belt requires that the penis be placed into a steel tube, bent down, attached to the front plate and locked to the waist belt.  Once the lock is set, there is no access to any of your naughty bits and you present a fairly flat profile.  There is a back plate that also accommodates a plug that can also be locked on.  I assure you that anyone locked in this belt will do whatever the keyholder demands, if it is a condition of their release.  The back plug must be released periodically – for a short time at least – to allow bowel movements.  Otherwise, the belt can be worn indefinitely.  Another feature of this belt is that the wearer has no choice but to sit when using the bathroom.
I added to my wardrobe with a sexy latex hobble skirt.  It is heavy latex and goes from waist to ankles.  When the bottom zipper is drawn closed and you are in 5” or higher heels, there is only one way to walk – mincing steps.  I have to admit I am a boot lover too.  So I had to pick up some patent leather lace-up knee high boots with pointy toes.  Pointed toe shoes are the sexiest in my estimation.  Fashion isn’t comfortable, of course, but a Mistress would always take sexy over comfort.  I also invested in a 28” corset.  I made sure it had heavy boning and garters.  I figured that this would allow me to look like a tarty maid.  I also bought a pair of sexy patent leather 6” heels with straps.  This allowed me to place a small lock through the strap hole to lock them tightly on my feet.  They too had pointed toes.
So how would all this look you might ask?  Well here are some images.  The quality of the shots is not great, but you get the idea.  

The first is me in a full body stocking – I love these – with my chastity belt and 28” corset.

The second is me in my maid uniform with petticoat, latex hobble skirt and knee high lace-up boots.

 This last one is me in my maid uniform, petticoat, stockings, and locking 6” heels.

I hope you enjoy these and would love to hear what you think.  I will be travelling to Florida for the next week visiting my father.  Hopefully I will check in to the blog and see some interesting comments – good or bad.

March 15, 2011

A Little History – II

Before I go on, it may be better to go back a few years. A prequel if you will. My first interest in bondage came from reading old issues of “Penthouse Letters.” While the other common men’s magazines were interesting, I found I was really turned on more by the written word, and especially if it had a female domination aspect to it. The bondage seemed fantastic. Soon I realized that FemDom combined will some form of force feminization or humiliation was an even better combination.

One day in an adult bookstore I saw my first Centurians magazines and Devonshire Productions videos. Centurians had so many wonderful kinky products. Leather, restraints, cuffs and collars. It all looked so delicious. So I bought something from them. Probably some cuffs. More importantly, this put me on their mailing list. At the same time I picked up a Devonshire Productions (“DP”) video. They were fantastic. The bondage was superb, the positions were very strenuous – almost always posed in the same dungeon backdrop - and the models were gorgeous. Years ago men were really not featured in many bondage videos.  I was soon on their mailing list as well.

As the magazine lists and annual sales came in from Centurians, I noticed that they had some Forced Feminization magazines. Mostly the slaves were forced to obey because their Mistress had placed them in chastity – one sold by Centurians – to make them obedient and compliant. Usually these Mistresses used some sort of forced feminization techniques to enhance their slave’s compliance. I began to wonder what it would be like if a woman pierced my nipples and penis and installed a frenum with breakoff screws or placed me on hormones in order to make me her sissified slave. At the same time all the DP vids I was watching were of women – always in very high heels and tight corsets - forced to endure strict bondage, usually secured standing in one place in what one would presumably be many hours. Many times in a strict armbinder and leather hood or tight mummification.

Here are two examples. Both just fantastic. The armbinders, the way the head is pulled back, and both are actually wearing ballet heels. I can imagine the pump gag is fully inflated against the hood, the corset is crushingly tight, and the collar is secured with a very heavy lock. Excellent use of straps for immobilization as well.

All these images started to jell and form my psyche. Bondage, femdom, femdom through forced feminization, chastity, lovely sexy models, suffering, pleasing a Mistress, humiliation, and physical changes beyond my control that would add to my submissiveness. I wanted to be one of the bondage models for DP. Subjected to chastity and feminization before being put on display in strict bondage for their videos. Or even one of the stories in the Centurion’s magazines. “Feminized Chastity Slave in Constant Bondage Becomes Sissy Maid to Mistress and her Friends” might have been the story header. It would be a story of complete and permanent transformation combined with a life of strict bondage, total servitude and obedience.

I will close today’s post with some of those early images that formed who I am today. I will certainly post more in the future.

First – This video cover is perhaps one of the most formative images for me. It is the cover jacket of a video of a woman who delivers her significant other to a castle where the Mistress is charged with transforming him through heavy doses of hormones, 24/7 strict bondage and obedience training over a period of six months. Although done in the 1970’s it is a fantastic video. I wished I was the transformed sissy being returned to her owner. The cover jacket was fantastic. Armbinder, dungeon, latex, nipple clamps, pump gag, chains, corset, sensory deprivation hood and posture collar.

The next series were from the various “Forced Womanhood / Slave Piercing” genre distributed by Centurians.

 These images are stunning to me. The frenum chastities, the armbinders or ceiling chains, the nipple rings generally attached to chastities, strict corsets, ballet boots or very high heels, and the use of straps, gags, collars and locks give a sense of hopelessness of their situation. Further, each of these sissies appears that they have been or are likely to be in their current state of bondage and discomfort for a very long time. Possibly this is to build up their endurance for more strict training to follow or to keep a sissy out of the way while the Mistress enjoys some simple pleasures, visits with friends, possibly goes to work for the day, or heads to the comfort of her bed for the evening. Wherever she is, one can imagine that the Mistress will take great pleasure with the knowledge that her sissy is not getting into any mischief, and that she anxiously awaits her Mistress’s return – hopefully to release her from her predicament and not to add further torment. The Mistress, of course, has no reason to lessen a sissy’s suffering unless she is needed to perform some duty or service for the Mistress or her friends.

Any thoughts or comments?

A Goal of Mistress Cindy

A new follower of this blog has a fetlife group,, that has the following video link listed:

Mistress Cindy loves the video and hopes someday soon I will be able to take something like this easily.  Like a hot knife through butter.  As you can see, Mistress Cindy has big goals for me!

She likes this one too!

And this one!

and these:

March 14, 2011

A little something from Mistress Cindy

I figured it was about time I introduced myself : I am Mistress Cindy - owner of sissy amy. I have instructed amy to create and maintain this blog for a number of reasons, a few of which she has already mentioned. My priority in regards to this blog is for amy to gain the confidence that I think she needs to further push herself to be a better sissy-slave. There are so many things that I hope we will get to experience in our future together and as you all will see, it has already been quite a long path.

As amy has already noted, we met online almost 10 years ago through a mummification group. At the time I was trying to quell my own submissive tendencies. Needless to say, I was a reluctant Domme. Sexually I had always been submissive. My work environment has always been in male dominated fields and as such, I had no choice but to "grow balls" and be one of the boys in order to gain and maintain their respect. The pretty girl, bat your eyes and play coy does not work with a bunch of men.

Never one to turn down an opportunity to try something new, when amy & I first met I will admit that I was overwhelmed, scared witless and didn't have a clue what to do. But somehow we managed and at some point I came to the realization that I actually enjoyed being the Dominant, being in control of the situation. A Domme is born! The rest, as they say, is history. I will let amy recount for you our trials and tribulations...they do make for an interesting tale.

I would like to ask our wonderful followers and readers to please feel free to make comments, ask questions and to make suggestions. We will try to answer them to the best of our abilities. This blog is just another chapter in our journey through life.

Thank you all again for taking the time to read this blog. I am looking forward to hearing from some of you soon!

Mistress Cindy

March 12, 2011

A Little History - I

I first met Mistress Cindy online over ten years ago.  We were both members of a yahoo group – but I do not remember which particular one.  Instant messaging is a wonderful thing.  I IM’d Mistress Cindy and we began a conversation.  We were both quite interested in bondage and had experienced some amount of play with others.  Interestingly, we were both on the submissive side of the equation.  It was also clear from the beginning that we both preferred strict bondage.  Nothing bugged us both more than looking at images that would have the submissive in loose ties, escapable mummy wraps and comfortable situations.  People – a single layer of plastic wrap over a torso is not really bondage.  Five layers of shrinkable pallet wrap with just a breathing tube totally covering the body, feet en pointe, hands balled – that is good for starters.  Uuummmm.  But I digress.

I have always considered myself to be a pretty good judge of people.  I am amazed how through IM it is almost easier to assess people than if they were standing right in front of you.  First physical clues are not there to deceive you.  You get a much better sense of the person.  IM allows you to determine idiots in a second, self indulged people in a minute, normal people over a conversation and truly intelligent, quality people over the course of several conversations.  Well it was very clear that Mistress Cindy fell into the last category.  We had wonderful conversations, exchanged pictures from the web, exchanged pictures of ourselves in bondage and carried on a wonderful online conversation.

As you might imagine, we discussed from time to time what we might do if we ever got together.  Right from the beginning, Mistress Cindy told me that if we ever got together, it would only be with Her as the dominant.  I am sure part of that was intelligent, self protection on Her part, but She was also interested in exploring that side.  I certainly agreed that that would certainly be acceptable and appropriate.  I also told Her that I owned a stainless steel chastity belt that I would lock myself in while we were together and allow Her to control the keys.  This made Her very happy.  I knew there was a big risk in doing that, as the belt is no CBx000 toy.  One’s entire package is inaccessible completely with some parts behind two layers of steel.  When locked the hasps are not accessible and the steel is very thick.  Without the keys, my only choice would be a locksmith – and that would be quite embarrassing.  But I felt I knew Her well enough to allow that if we ever got together…

If you are enjoying these posts or this blog, or even if you are not, please feel free to leave a comment here or drop a note to me or Mistress Cindy (especially if it is for Her eyes only).  We like to know if you find this journey interesting and learn of your thoughts and opinions.

First Picture Added

I hope you like this first picture I am posting.  Pink is such a pretty color.

March 9, 2011

The Submission, Training and Feminization of Sissy Amy

I was directed to create this blog at the direction of Mistress Cindy.  Mistress Cindy is very interested in using this media as a way to deepen my submission and accelerate my path to total sissification.  I, of course, have no idea of all Her plans for this blog, other than I am certain that I will be expected to produce musings that will please Her greatly.  In turn She will use it to push my limits as She has done from the beginning.  She has suggested that She wants a wide and active and participatory readership.  I am not sure this bodes well for me.  She will post items as She desires.
To date, She has used bondage, feminization, exposure and humiliation to mold me into a pleasing sissy.  She relishes my discomfort in my progress to being Her sissy slave.  But She has revealed to me that She has much more planned for me.  She began this journey with me out of curiosity.  She has continued it with verve and abandon as She has very much come to love it.  She has informed me that it is Her intention that I experience everything real women experience.  From feeling pretty to feeling sexy to feeling vulnerable, ogled and being filled in every way possible.   She believes I must experience tastes and smells and sensations that generally only women experience if I am to become Her ideal sissy and to learn how to look and act desirable beyond words and to provide flawless service to Her and to all whom She directs.
Mistress loves to employ chastity upon me whenever possible.  She says sissies should be chaste and we will address this in future posts.  When we are able to, Mistress Cindy is my keyholder and I am permitted release only with Her permission and never in Her presence.  Chastity makes me very pliable in Her control.  Frustration enhances Her control over me.  My desire to please Her soars with each passing day of denial.  Thoughts of disobedience evaporate.  Her pleasure is all I care about and focus on.  Whether it is from seeing me confined, tormented, teased, humiliated, or just a sight to behold with me dressed and made up to the nines or at Her complete and total service; She is easily aroused.  Time and again I must bring that arousal to completion, using only my hands (if I am able to), my mouth and my tongue.
The journey has just begun and this blog will be the instrument documenting and expanding my limits of sliding further into complete submission and feminization.  For my part I expect Mistress Cindy will look forward to any good counsel offered by the readership that She may wish to incorporate or involve in my complete emasculation and training for impeccable service.  I cannot now predict where this will go, but we have come a long way already.  Follow the journey of where we have come from and see or guide us to where we are going.

What to Expect
So what can you expect in this blog?  Soon I will post some background information about how Mistress Cindy and Sissy Amy’s relationship developed and many of our adventures.  As I said, Mistress Cindy will control the content that gets posted.  However, She has told me that the readership can expect me to post pictures of me in various en femme outfits – many of which I may not even currently own.  From there I would expect I may also be posting videos of me in sexy ensembles or bondage or both.  Mistress Cindy enjoys placing me in strict bondage and extended chastity.  My mental or physical comfort is of no concern to Her.  Indeed, quite the contrary.  She enjoys seeing me suffer both physically and through public humbling.  Moreover, She is aware of the positive benefits that constant and ever escalating training both mentally and physically in being the only surefire way to achieve Her goals for me – Total Sissification.  She demands it.  Expect to see lots of leather and stainless steel, ballet and 6” heels, corsets, total mummification in fiberglass and many other methods of control She has used in Her training.    
In fact, Mistress Cindy has suggested that it would be ideal if I were to do some modeling for a photographer or film maker of which some of the content could be posted here.  Any remuneration, regardless of how nominal, would belong to Mistress Cindy.  This worries me for the incentive this creates.  Mistress Cindy seems interested in services that Her sissy could avail herself of the readership, whether in the application of flattering and sexy makeup, enrolling in a proper maid academy or being fitted for sexy corsets, clothes and heels.  Mistress Cindy loves all these ideas.